Breathless Rivera Cancun

Come through it’s lit!

One of my best friends turned 30 in August. She wanted to celebrate at a luxury all inclusive resort in Mexico, y’all know I like all inclusive so off we go. A note on booking, I’ve been doing my own research on the best sites to book vacations and I think I’m pretty sold on United Vacations. I used them to book my Europe trip with my sister last year as they were one of the few travel sites that allowed for multi-stop travel bookings. Vacations.united.com is their site, seriously, its pretty seamless, and I’m saying this as a person who is not getting paid to advertise for them. Oddly, ‘regular’ United Airlines customer service is awful, United Vacations is clearly a completely different company.

Anyway, my friend picked the Breathless resort in Rivera Cancun. It’s only about 15-20 minutes away from the Cancun airport ( which is great!). Let me say, that this resort is beautiful y’all. The property is not big, it’s not small, and everything is walkable.

There are a few different options to choose from when you book, they have some VIP club area if you book the VIP experience, but I didn’t really care about that this time.

There are two zones of the hotel, at least that I noticed:

1. The party zone. It’s just as the name suggests, there’s a DJ next to the swim up bar, and the music is jumpin’. It’s mostly house/dance/techno music with a sprinkle of hip hop. Oh! And we found out that the party zone is also the tops optional zone. There was only one topless woman the whole time I was there so booo.

2. The not party zone. It has a big pool and a swim up bar too. This is where we spent most of our time.

I didn’t take really any photos because I needed a fuckin break from my phone. My 9-5 has been stressing me the fuck out so I left that phone in my room.

I have grown to love love love resorts that have top shelf liquor. Some of the crap the lower priced resorts have is like rubbing alcohol with splash of La Croix flavoring ( i love La Croix, but this is a bad combination). This resort even had Hennessy, which I’ve never seen at any resort I’ve graced with my presence.

The food was good, the service was a good, the check-in and check-out process is a pain in the entire ass. You know when you go to the bank and want to open a new account, and you have to wait your turn to sit with a banker? Yeah, it was like that. The lobby is not air conditioned, so i literally stood there for 15 minutes sweating waiting to sit at a desk to check in.

This is the first resort I’ve been to that asked me to sign an agreement to not smoke or purchase marijuana on the resort, or they’d put me out. I signed it, and then I found out there were guys on the beach selling weed, and so I bought some and smoked it. Resort security claimed they saw me talking to the weed guys, but I told them they were crazy and then got high on my balcony.

I won’t make this a super long post, but I really did like that resort and would recommend it to anyone looking for a more upscale adults only resort.

Oh, a note on the cost, I paid 1000 for a room by myself for a 4 day stay. If I’d done double occupancy I could have saved some money, but I needed a break from every-damn-body.

Oh one more note, I got hit on by a lot of men and I’m noticing that there seem to be more and more men that like masculine of center lesbians (or women in general?). Thats probably a whole post on its own.

Happy resorting y’all

-AJ